Aside to 3-year program, Lexapro is finally kicking in. I've seen how I have been lately and from what happened yesterday. I lowered my dose from 20mg to 10mg couple of days after talking to Dr. and we both agreed that it would be better for me to take it at night since it had me very drowsy in the beginning.
So, yesterday I finally felt that the medicine was working...because 10 mg was wearing out on me, and I felt myself coming down with my emotions. One of my roomies was so stressed and frustrated from her day and that definitely affected me and my moods. I sure didn't see that coming. It felt so strange, yet familiar and made me realize that the medicine is definitely working. That's when I knew I had to increase my dose to 20mg, and I became stable again.
My therapist told me last week how I will need to relearn to what it's like to be myself again, since medicine gives clients new perspectives on things. And that it's good idea to write journals again, to see where I am going with my moods and recognizing feelings. It's an incredibly erratic experience.
for some people it's easier to follow others and choose not what is the best thing for them. in a small program like the DOC, there is pressure even though nobody talks about it. i'm proud of you for making the decision that is best for you and only yourself. :)
ReplyDeletei completed my studies in 2 years because i wanted to be OVER with school and i knew i could do it. I was too antsy and had no desire to extend my years of studies. however, i will admit that there were times once in a while where i wish i had -- only because i wish i could take the time to soak in what i learned. i like how you put it as "quality learning" which is exactly true. so i think that is really great.
even though it will take you 3 years, you still will walk on that stage.
again, am proud of you. ;)
and i'm glad the meds are getting you to be stable again. because that s what it's supposed to do. the way I look at it, it's a positive thing. unfortunately there are people who give up once they don't feel normal (like you did before) and continue to see poppin' meds as a negative thing. just the way our society is. :( hope you're doing the journal thing or using the space here.
zozo